Who am I and why the hell should you care about reading my blog?

Avid motorcyclist & freelance writer, specializing in motorcycles & motorcycle related topics, with a healthy dose of good humor, good vibes & general advice on simply being a good person.
Showing posts with label Triumph. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Triumph. Show all posts

Saturday, December 3, 2022

HELLFIGHTERS!

The Hellfighters

Hellfighters... what a cool name, right? But who, or rather what, is the Hellfighters Motorcycle Shop? Check out their website by clicking here. If you're not really in the mood to do any more clickin', keep reading and I'll give you the MotoWriter rundown.



So much more than a motorcycle shop

Hellfighters is a motorcycle shop in Laurel, MS (<click the link for more info), but it's not just a motorcycle shop, it's a swap meet, a gun store, a gift and home store, a restaurant, a chapel, a Rhino Jeeps dealer, and a Christian Ministry, all wrapped up in a huge repurposed industrial building that has been beautifully converted to house it all.

The Hellfighters shop is truly a sight to behold. The last time I was there was several years ago and it was pretty cool then, albeit, relatively small and pretty cramped up. But on this latest visit, just a couple of weeks ago, I discovered that the old building was vacant and the new building, which is situated right around the corner, was clearly open for business... ALL of the business. The new building is over 83,000 square feet of awesomeness. Upon walking in, I saw a massive inventory of used motorcycles, with cool movie props spread around for our viewing pleasure. My wife perused the home decor section for at least half an hour, and my son and I got lost in the rest of the place. Then, after seeing the main section, we saw the swap meet. Let me tell you about the swap meet... it was a huge room, filled with every motorcycle part you could possibly need. I won't get into too much detail about the rest of the place, because honestly, I don't think I could do it justice by mere words. You really do need to go check it out in person. 

So, why is this place so big? Why is it so popular? How does a Christian Ministry turn into a motorcycle destination, especially in a modern society that seems to reject, or at the least question, God's existence? The answer, is God.



The Mission

When so many people are afflicted with pain and consumed by addictions of every kind, the Hellfighters Ministry is right there, willing and able to help them find their way to salvation. They are not only spreading the word of God, but they are actively practicing His ways and trying to help save as many lost souls as they can. According to their website- 100% of the profit (that is every cent) goes to Mission at the Cross in Laurel, MS so that men suffering from addiction can find recovery, and Jesus, for free. Mission at the Cross was started by the founders of Hellfighters, Richard and Gina Headrick back in 1998, from a little ministry service that they called "the Bum Ministries." Read more detail about it by clicking here- it really is a neat story and really proves that God works in mysterious ways, and often, He works through the most unassuming people among us, people that we might not normally notice or if we do, we might try our best to avoid.


Location, location, location




They say that location is everything and I'll agree with that. Laurel is a pretty nice place and, it's even gained notoriety from the extremely popular HGTV show, Hometown, which follows Ben and Erin Napier as they renovate one place at a time and ultimately revitalize areas of small, otherwise forgotten little towns. They do great work and show their love of small town USA, again and again in their efforts. I'm not really big into watching television, but I have seen their work in Laurel, MS and in Wetumpka, AL and I'm pretty impressed with it. They've really helped to revitalize these little towns and the small, locally owned businesses there are thriving. As for the location of the Mission at the Cross and the Hellfighters Shop, Laurel is, once again, an ideal spot on the map. It's close enough to be accessible from several larger urban areas, where problems with homelessness and addiction seem to be the worst, but it's far enough away from them to help those in need focus on their recovery. It's also right off of I-59 (and you can't miss the signs). 



Go check 'em out

Make a point to go visit the good folks at Hellfighters USA. Go check out the good work they are doing and, even if you don't need anything, buy a little something from them anyway to help in their mission of helping those poor lost souls to find salvation and recovery. You never know who you might be giving a second chance to. They are open most days from 8am until 5 pm (the others, they're open until 6 pm), except of course on Sundays, when they close the doors to rest, and give thanks to our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

One thing I always try to promote here in my little corner of the interweb, is the encouragement to live your life in a good and just way, to be a good person and to live in such a way that honors God and spreads good will. I think that's why I like the Hellfighters so much, because they aren't just writing about it, they have the means to do good and are actively helping people become better versions of themselves, and I think that's a really awesome thing to do.

Ride safe, make good choices and help your fellow man if you can and, if you can't, then try to help those that are already doing it.




MotoWriter side note:

By now, this should go without saying, but I'll say it again- I'm not paid by the Hellfighters, the Mission at the Cross or any other entity for my posts. I just like to review different things and places that I see and, being that I like to stay positive on my blog, I usually only write about the things and places that I really like or that really make a positive impact on me. 

I've often said that I'd be happy to get on a company's payroll, but for this one, I'll forego my previous sentiments. You see, The Hellfighters' mission is not only an honorable endeavor, but one that serves to improve our society, spread the gospel of our Lord and save lives. Even if they did offer to pay me for my humble words, I wouldn't accept their money- I would gladly donate my time and my words in service to their mission. 

-Thank you for your time and support, MotoReaders.



Saturday, June 12, 2021

Summer Bummin'

I'm still here... sorta

If you've been wondering why you haven't been seeing much activity on The MotoWriter site lately, I'd love to tell you that it's been because I've been bummin' around, riding, relaxing and exploring new backroads on my scooter. Unfortunately though, that hasn't been the case at all. I've been working... A LOT... around my house and at my "payin' job". I've had quite a few projects at the house that have been long overdue and I've finally had an opportunity to start working on them. One of the more relevant to this blog has been a fork tube replacement for my Sportster and all the rest has been manual labor stuff around my property. My 8-5 job, which at times has a tendency to numb my creativity like a bottle of cheap bourbon, has been demanding a lot of my time and energy and most nights all I've wanted to do was stretch out and let my brain rest. 

No need to worry though, I've got some new stuff in the works that I hope to post over the next couple of weeks. Doing all this work at my place has been giving me plenty of time to think about, and reflect on, a variety of things and I'm looking forward to sharing some of those observations with you, my MotoReaders. I've also been working on getting some swag designed and made for you guys (think- stickers, t-shirts, coozies and maybe even some kind of bandana). The first to get some goodies will be my BOTM features (Lee, Matt & Presley- I'm talking about you!). Sadly, I never received any submissions for April, May or June... so it looks like the BOTM feature may have been a short-lived venture that met an early demise. I was really hoping to get a little more interaction with my readers, but it's no sweat... not everyone wants to show off their bikes or tell their stories and that's A-OK with me. I'm cool with y'all just popping in from time to time to read my blog or watch my videos. 

So if you haven't given up on me yet, and you're still checking in on my little corner of the interweb, reading my words, thank you. I sincerely appreciate you and I'll do my best to push out some new stuff soon. Hell, I might even try to kick out a new vlog post on my YouTube channel, just to show you what's new on the best little coastline in the country.

Check back soon and in the meantime, enjoy this warm weather, ride safe and make good choices! 




 

Saturday, December 5, 2020

What was your first motorcycle?

Do you remember your first motorcycle?

I'm afraid that I might be a little too analytical to answer my own question in a simple way, as I tend to overthink things way too much. For example, the first motorcycle that I actually owned, as in- the bike was legally registered in my name- was a 1990 Kawasaki EX500. My very first motorbike, however, was a very used Otasco mini-bike. It had no suspension, a horizontal shaft, pull start Tecumseh engine with a whopping 3.5 horsepower, an extremely worn out centrifugal clutch and a completely exposed chain. Ah yes, by today's standards it was a veritable death trap! My dad bought it for me from my big brother's junior high friend and I tore up the streets and trails on that little bike. In all honesty, I was probably a little too big for it, but I didn't care- I was having the time of my life. 

Motorcycles just make everything better. 

Terminator was a cool movie... but it got even cooler when the cybernetic killer from the future threw his leg over that Honda 750 Four and started chasing down the heroes while wielding a machine gun. When Beatrix Kiddo (aka Uma Thurman) donned that skin tight yellow riding suit and straddled that Kawasaki ZZR250, it certainly didn't hurt ticket sales... although that one may have had more to do with who was riding, rather than what she was riding. Regardless though... she wouldn't have been wearing that motorcycle suit if she wasn't riding a motorcycle in the movie. 

I'd be willing to bet that you know, or have known someone that you were never really interested in talking to until you found out they rode a motorcycle, then they suddenly became more interesting. Funeral escorts seem more dignified when they are being escorted by police motorcycles, Mardi Gras parades are often kicked off by police motorcycles rolling through the parade route first. Kids of all ages love seeing them riding and most people who cringe at the sight of a police officer will be the first to run up and take a picture with a Motor cop. I think the reason is because almost everyone can relate, in some way, to a person on a motorcycle. Motorcycles make people cooler and more approachable.

What bike inspired you, or your passion for riding?

The bike that did it for me was a 1980 Suzuki GN400X that my brother got from a friend of his. The bike was brought over to our house in boxes and I was immediately enthralled by it. I asked my brother what he was going to do with it and when he said that he wasn't going to do anything with it, I jumped on the opportunity to put the puzzle back together. I was maybe 13 or 14, had no knowledge of motorcycles, no service manuals to guide me and no Google to ask because the internet didn't even exist yet. But with a lot of determination, a little patience, a lot of trial and error and a fair share of blind luck, I was able to piece and part that thing back together. 

I still remember the feeling I got when I kicked that bike over and it actually fired up, and I'll never forget my very first ride on it. I loved riding dirt bikes, but there was just something different about the feeling I got when I twisted the throttle on that old Suzuki for the first time. Something just clicked and it was as if a piece of my own puzzle had just popped into place. At that very moment, a seed was planted that would take several years to sprout. When it finally broke through to the light though, what started as a tiny little seed would later grow into a towering passion that would come to define so many aspects of my life. I don't think I could have ever imagined that while I was sitting in our driveway on that old Suzuki, with it's single cylinder 400cc engine thumping for the first time in years, that the memory of that moment would become so influential in my life.

Why we ride.

Every person has their own reason, or reasons, why they choose to brave the dangers and ignore the warnings from their mothers, friends and co-workers about the dangers of motorcycle riding. If you've never seen it, I highly recommend the documentary film, Why We Ride. Even if you  don't ride... actually, specifically if you don't ride...  you should watch it. It might give you some insight about those people in your life that do ride motorcycles and why riding is so important to us. 

Riding my motorcycle is therapeutic. It gives me an opportunity to clear my mind and compartmentalize all of those things that are rattling around inside my head so that I can prioritize what's important and dump what's not. My wife has told me that she can see a difference in my overall mood when I've been off the bike for too long. There are so many times in my life that I've been able to find solace behind a set of handlebars and inner peace in the steady rumble of a motorcycle engine. I've also had a lot of fun on a motorcycle. I've enjoyed the camaraderie of riding with groups of friends, the dignity of riding in escorts and the exhilaration of riding through the mountains with my bike leaning so far over that sparks were flying. I've had adventures, explored new places and yes, I've even had a few close calls.

Your story.

What's your life story going to look like? If someone were to make a Hollywood movie about your life, with your favorite actor playing you, what would it be about and how interesting would it be? I'm not suggesting that any of us live our lives like a Tinseltown flick, but when you are drawing your last breaths and looking back over your life, will your life have been an action-adventure, a comedy, a drama or a tragedy?

I'm not sure that my life story would be a blockbuster- instead, I imagine it being a low-budget, over produced, action film with cheesy dad jokes, bad wardrobes and a completely random soundtrack. But I think it would be a fun movie to watch, with a lot of love, a little tragedy and a whole lot of great supporting characters to carry it through to the end credits. 

Fill your life with memories that you fondly remember and give your family and friends a good story to tell after your gone. You don't have to have a lot, to live a lot. After all, you never can tell, sometimes those low-budget, B-rated, movies become cult classics that end up being loved and remembered for generations. 





Saturday, November 28, 2020

Brand Loyalty- how far is too far?

Brand loyalty... how far is too far?

OK, I'll admit... I may not be the "best" brand ambassador for Harley-Davidson. But in my defense, I'm honest, hardworking and I don't make a lot of dough, so I need to actually get what I'm paying for. I would consider myself to be more of a spokesman of the working class for Harley-Davidson. I love my Harley-Davidson motorcycles but I'm not a blind follower of them, or of any brand for that matter. If they do something right, I'll sing their praises to everyone I meet, if they shit the bed on something, I'll do my best to try to point it out so they can improve. Think of it like getting constructive criticism from your best friend. 


Take my boots

A year ago, I picked up a pair of TCX riding boots from Union Garage in Brooklyn, NY. I paid $199 and got free shipping... so I got a sweet pair of boots and still had enough left over for a Snicker bar. I bought them without ever even trying them on. Why? Because I read a ton of honest reviews from fellow riders who, like me, refuse to blindly follow a brand name. I believe in the tried and true method of evaluation and review from people who understand that sometimes companies get it right, and sometimes they don't. I did a six month review of my boots back in May (and I'll be doing a one year review soon) so that anyone on a budget that is looking for a new pair of riding boots can read it and, hopefully, get a little insight on them. I got some good feedback on my review and even had some guy claiming to be a rep of the company reach out to me and ask if it was okay if he posted it to the company website (I told him yes, but I don't know if it ever got added). I look at it this way- there might be somebody out there who, like me, has just enough extra scratch at the end of the month to be able to ride motorcycles. Chances are, they probably don't have thousands of dollars a year that they can spend to experiment with gear, so just like reading Yelp reviews on the local greasy spoons- we can get a better idea of where to, or not to, spend our hard-earned money. I don't believe in being a rude, over-critical ass; I just believe in the effectiveness of constructive criticism. 

Die-hard loyalists

I get a kick out of these die-hard loyalists who take the brand loyalty thing way too far. I have a friend, who will remain nameless, that is that guy. His bike is the best- it is the fastest, makes the most horsepower, the most torque, has the best paint, the highest quality finishes and is the most nimble, as well as the most comfortable, motorcycle that has ever been built in the United States and abroad. Of course, that is strictly his, not-at-all humble, opinion. I also get a kick out of these Indian riders who claim that Harley-Davidson is now suddenly going to file for bankruptcy because Polaris has recently breathed life back into the long-dead Indian name. I seem to remember all those same comments being made by the Victory Motorcycle guys a few years back and we can all see how that turned out.

You might be saying, "now hold on just a dag-gummed minute Mr. MotoWriter... you can't compare Victory to Indian!" No? Why not? Because Indian has been around "Since 1901" or because it was "America's FIRST motorcycle company"? Well... I wrote a little nugget about that, too. You can read the brief history of Indian Motorcycles here if you'd like. Look, I like Indians and I think that they have a LOT of potential and if the executives over at Polaris want to give me a loaner bike for a year, and some of that sweet Indian swag to go with it, I'll do a fair, honest long-term review and evaluation of their bike and products. Hell, if I like their products enough, I might even buy 'em. 

Harley guys aren't the worst, but they're close

Harley-Davidson is an iconic brand. It has somehow survived over a century, through good and prosperous times and through countless recessions; not to mention, surviving the Great Depression which befell the country a mere 26 years after the company first rolled out their first production motorcycle. They've managed to keep a consistent customer base over the decades, have seen years of profits and years of losses, but yet they remain. The guys and gals that stand behind the Motor Company are, no doubt, a big part of the reason that the Milwaukee based company is still churning out new bikes after all these years. With that said, they can be a bit ridiculous. I've heard people say things like "I'd rather push my Harley than ride a Honda." Really? I'll call bullshit on that one. "Harley's don't leak oil, they mark their territory." Yep- bullshit. If I buy a brand new motorcycle (or any vehicle for that matter) and it leaks oil- somebody's gonna hear about it. I think that one of the reasons Harleys catch such a bad rap from other brand enthusiasts is because of those die-hard loyalists who defend the company even when it's failed or failing it's customers. 

Warning- this next part might offend you.

We may not all agree on this- but defending a company when it produces a crappy product is akin to giving out participation trophies. You're doing them a disservice. You're telling them that putting in a half-assed effort is good enough and that losing is still winning. By blindly defending Harley-Davidson, you are basically telling the MoCo that it's okay that they made a crappy product. In my long term review of my 2017 Road King Special, I beat the MoCo up a little. I wouldn't say that I picked the bike apart, but I did point out some deficiencies in the quality. Maybe, if we are all lucky enough, somebody over at H-D HQ will watch that video and say "damn, we need to correct those issues." If you go to a restaurant and the food is awful, are you going to tell your friends how great it was? I would certainly hope not.

Let's help them survive

Look, I don't know about you, but I want ALL of these companies to improve and survive and the best way to do that, is to hold them each accountable when they screw something up and not be so blindly loyal that we refuse to offer them any sort of criticism, or even recognize what their deficiencies are. I'm not saying let's boycott Harley-Davidson because they put a shitty finish on a few parts and I'm not suggesting that we force Polaris to kill off Indian because they have had some electrical issues. I am, however, suggesting that we, the customers, give them good, honest and constructive criticism so that they can improve their products for us. After all, we will all benefit from those improvements- we (the customers) will get a better product and the companies will make more money in return sales and be able to stay afloat going into the future. 

I truly love the diversity in the motorcycle market. I don't just love Harley-Davidson motorcycles- I love ALL motorcycles. I want Polaris-Indian to put pressure on Harley-Davidson and I want Harley-Davidson to continue making motorcycles that set the standard for overall style, comfort and performance (some people will roll their eyes at this, but history proves this statement to be true). I really hated to see Polaris shut the doors on Victory and it was such a disappointment to see Yamaha dump the Star line of cruisers. Honda is still going strong, introducing an all new Rebel 1100 for 2021 and Suzuki's Boulevard line and Kawasaki's Vulcan line both seem strong. BMW's new R-18 is an exciting addition to the cruiser world and Triumph's line of "Modern Classics" offer even more styles for us to choose from. To be completely honest, I'd love to see the resurrection and success of some of the old motorcycle companies that have fallen to the wayside. Can you imagine if BSA, Brough Superior, Vincent, Victory, Excelsior-Henderson, Pierce-Arrow, Ace, Crocker or Acme were still pushing out new products? Think of the innovation and the options that we might have! I get giddy just thinking about it! 

Competition is a good thing 

Competition drives advancement and each one of these companies should be in a head to head competition with each other, not to destroy the other guys, but to earn our money instead. If we do our part as the end-user and tell them what we want, what we don't want, what we like and yes, even what we don't like, we can give them a clear path to the future to build products for us that we can enjoy for years to come. They might even earn the business of our kids and grandkids and if things work out- maybe every motorcycle company can eventually brag about being in business for over a hundred years.

As for me- I'll just be down here in South Mississippi riding my Harley-Davidson along our beautiful coastline, and writing a few things to entertain you good folks, while I'm waiting patiently for one of these companies to reach out to me to do a long-term review of their products. 

Stay tuned for more reviews coming up, and in the meantime, ride safe and make good choices!















Sunday, September 20, 2020

Hurricanes

Living on the Gulf Coast is awesome    

Along America's Southern Coastal border we have around 10 months of great riding weather complimented by coastal breezes, beautiful scenery, friendly people and some of the best food that will ever cross your taste buds. In one day, you can ride next to beautiful white sand beaches, cross over bays, bayous and marshes and, just a few minutes later, be cruising past cattle pastures, old homesteads and rolling hills. Want a piece of big city action? No problem- to the West we have New Orleans and to the East we have Mobile, Gulf Shores, Pensacola and Destin. The roads are pretty decent, there are plenty of gas stations and restaurants to stop at and there is no shortage of motorcycle shops to keep you rolling. But, as is the case with any area that has so many benefits, there is the occasional drawback that is there to keep you humble. In our case, it's the Tropics.

Tropical storms and hurricanes 

Every year, beginning around the month of June, Southerners start tuning in to weather channels, begin checking their generators and re-stocking their supplies of canned goods and bottled water. The reason? June marks the beginning of the Atlantic hurricane season. While the tropics don't always deliver storms to our estuary coastline, we always keep a watchful eye on anything that spins too close to the Leeward Islands. For those that are unaware, a Tropical Storm gets it's name when it reaches a wind speed of 39 miles per hour. At 74 mph, it becomes a full-fledged, "category one" hurricane. While a cat-1 storm is more of an annoyance to most of us, a cat-5 storm, with sustained winds over 157 mph, is a bonafide killer. The most recent cat-5 to hit the Mississippi Gulf Coast was Hurricane Camille in 1969. In 2005, we got hit by Katrina, a very powerful, well defined storm that had grown in intensity to a category 5 storm, but according to the weather experts, had dropped to a strong category 3 by the time it made landfall over New Orleans, unleashing it's most powerful and most damaging winds across the Gulf Coast of Mississippi. If you were alive, or at least awake in history class, you will know that Hurricane Katrina was a killer on it's own merit- claiming over 1,800 souls and causing over $125 billion in property damage. That's a billion, with a "B." Our coastline was, quite literally, leveled. If Katrina was a Category 3 when it caused that kind of death and destruction, just try to imagine what a category 5 would do. 

Scary stuff, to be certain.

This year has been a busy one

2020 has maintained it's consistent level of overall SUCK and, only three months into this season, it has given us over 25 named storms. We still have three more months of "in-season" tropical storms to contend with. With that said, we've been pretty fortunate thus far, in that all we've really had to deal with so far has been a few rain-making tropical storms and an annoying category 1, Sally, that finally decided to make landfall to the east of us. We still have to make it until the end of November and, God willing, we will make it to December 1st unscathed.

I'll ride in the rain if I have to, but I don't ever want to

Riding in the rain sucks, that's all there is to it. But sometimes, you can't help it. On a road trip for example, you just can't avoid running in to an occasional rain shower. It's not ideal, but with proper gear, it's manageable. You'll rarely ever see me leave the house in the rain, unless there are some kind of extenuating circumstances. Some people may call me a "fair-weather rider" because I'd prefer to wait it out than assume the extra risks of riding in the rain, with limited visibility on slick roads, but those that know me, know that I've been soaked to the bone while riding through torrential downpours. I simply choose to ride smarter, whenever I can.

The problem with hurricane season 

The biggest problem with hurricane season is the seemingly constant deluge of rain. As I said, I don't exactly mind if I get caught in the rain while I'm out riding, but I definitely don't want to leave the house in a torrent and it seems like that's been every day lately. I said previously that in the South, we have around 10 months of good riding weather, and that is completely true... just not 10 consecutive months. 

Choose your poison, so to speak

We don't always get to pick where we grow up, but we get to pick where we live when we do. As a kid, my family moved to the Coast from the Midwest. When I was just an innocent little freckle faced ginger kid, I remember riding in the back seat of our mid '70's Chevrolet coupe and watching the landscape slowly changing the further we got away from the home I knew, to the home I would later come to know and love. I watched as the trees grew taller and lost their lower branches and saw their leaves turn into needles. The rolling landscape of dirt and rocks, slowly flattened out, the black dirt turning into orange clay and the rocks turning into sand. When we finally stopped, I stood on the edge of the continent as the waves splashed across my 8 year old feet and I smelled the hot salty air. I watched as shrimp boats slowly trawled along the horizon in front of me and seagulls squawked at the setting sun. In this new home, I would later meet the girl that would become my wife and a few years later, she would bless me with the gift of fatherhood. I rode my first motorcycle in this balmy, humid Southern air and I have survived more than 30 hurricane seasons. My wife and I tried to move away once, but we just couldn't resist the beckoning symphony of summertime cicadas buzzing in concert with crickets, tree frogs and owls, or the smell of the salty ocean breeze blowing in off the Gulf of Mexico under a spectacular sunset. 

We chose to make this place our home and even though the, seemingly constant, deluge of rain during hurricane season puts a damper on my motorcycle riding, the rain always breaks, the clouds always clear and the sun always comes back out.

Ride safe and make good choices, y'all.

-The MotoWriter









Thursday, May 7, 2020

Are you a REAL biker?

How do you know if you are a REAL biker?

I cringed as I typed that. Seriously, I can’t stand it when we label people. Labels are for underwear and beer bottles, not for people. We all do it; we label everyone. This person is my “best friend and ” that person is my “socafriend” (you’re welcome for that one, by the way); George is a “freak”; Candice is a “slut”; Fred is a “loser”; Tom is a “biker.” We just can’t help ourselves. 

So, how do know if you’re a REAL biker? Well, let’s take a look and see if we can figure out what a real biker actually is. The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines a biker as, “a person who rides a bicycle or motorcycle” while the Urban Dictionary defines a biker as “someone who not only owns a motorbike but rides it for pleasure as well as mere transport. They tend to be a friendly bunch but any who crosses them will be ‘persuaded’ not to do so again!” Ooohh… UD's definition seems pretty ominous, right? Of course, the Urban Dictionary is implying that a “biker” is someone that may, or may not, be associated with a certain group, or groups, of motorcycle enthusiasts that don’t necessarily consider themselves to be a part of the “99%” of law abiding motorcyclists out there. While not every entry into the Urban Dictionary may be on par with our trusty Merriam-Webster's, the UD certainly is reflective of our societal trends and common colloquialisms. Take the word “ratchet” for example, UD says that “ratchet” is “a ghetto-dialect mispronunciation of the English term "wretched." Meanwhile, we all know that a ratchet is a tool that we use when we are wrenching on our bikes. As it were, it seems that the only thing that these two, certainly reliable sources of literary information, have in common is that for there to be a biker, there must be a bike. 

If we can all agree that a biker has to have a motorcycle, we can move on to dissecting the “REAL” part of the term. We don’t need a dictionary to tell us what real is, we all know what’s real and what isn’t, so what makes a biker real or not? Is it his clothes- does he have to wear a leather vest with patches to be real? If so, what about all those motorcycle clubs that wear denim? Would you be so bold as to walk up to a group of them and inform them that their Levi Strauss denim vests do not meet the proper “leather vest” requirements, therefore they may not refer to themselves or their counterparts as “real bikers”? Perhaps the measure is their particular state of employment? Does a person have to be employed in some kind of labor trade to be a “real” biker, or can they be a doctor, an engineer or maybe even a cop? For that matter, can a woman be a real biker? What about a homosexual? 

Maybe we are just overthinking this whole damn thing… maybe it is as simple as their motorcycle? Perhaps, as the common perception goes, the only real bikers are Harley-Davidson owners. Unless, that is the particular biker in question does not have a Harley, but rather, he has a 1945 Indian… then maybe he can be a real biker. But, wait... what about the guy that rides the vintage Triumph chopper? You know, the guy that hand built his own hardtail frame then rebuilt a Triumph pre-unit that he found in a junkyard, bolted it in, then rode the ole beast across the country? Can he be a real biker, even though he’s kicking around on an old British powered machine? What about the guy in Japan that cut, chopped and built a badass custom bike out of a 1986 Honda Goldwing? And since we are talking about Goldwings, what about the Goldwing riders that have over 300,000 miles on their bikes and have ridden their machines in all four seasons in every state (and abroad) wearing their hi-viz jackets and mustard yellow safety helmets? Are they real bikers? What about Ted Simon, you know the guy that wrote the book, Jupiter's Travels (which, if you haven't read it, I HIGHLY recommend that you do)? Ted Simon wrote that book after he spent four years riding his 500cc 1973 Triumph T100 around the world through 45 countries. Is Ted Simon a real biker? You're damned right he is.

You see, I've known a lot of people that have Harley-Davidson motorcycles who say that people who ride bikes like Suzuki GSXRs, Kawasaki Ninjas, Yamaha Stratoliners or Honda Shadows can’t be real bikers, no matter how dedicated to riding they are, simply because they don't ride American bikes. These are the same guys, by the way, that have their $25,000 Harley-Davidsons parked in the garage 10 months out of the year. You know them, they are the guys that brag about all the rallies they go to, yet their bikes see more miles riding on the back of a trailer than they do rolling on their own rubber; they're the same guys that only ride to the local bike nights whenever the weather is "Goldilocks perfect." I’ve also heard that only men can be real bikers, but I've seen some ladies rippin' the curves in the mountains and they sure as hell looked like real bikers to me. I've known a few folks that live, as the polite folks would say- an alternative lifestyle, that ride motorcycles (some of whom ride Harley-Davidsons). I know cops that are in motorcycle clubs and I've seen more than a few nurses, doctors and several engineers that ride. 

Growing up as a ginger kid, I was given plenty of labels. It certainly didn't help that I wore those auburn locks in a fantastically awful, late '80's powered mullet and wore ripped up, stone-washed jeans. In my youth, I had a few second-hand dirt bikes and I took an old Suzuki GN400X that came to our house in boxes, fumbled my way through putting it back together not knowing what the hell I was doing, and got it running. I rode that thing until my folks got rid of it one day while I was at school. All their best efforts to protect their baby boy from the dangers of two wheels was all for naught, though. I started back on a Kawasaki EX500, then I moved on to cruisers. I've had a couple of Hondas, a Yamaha and... well... a few different Harley-Davidsons. It's bizarre to see it typed out, but I've ridden over 100,000 miles of paved roads on two wheels and countless miles of dirt trails. Does that make me a real biker? Honestly, I don't know, and frankly, I don't care. Neither should you. If you want to call yourself a biker, or even the highly coveted real biker, then go for it. It's just a silly label anyway.